I came to school weighing in at 134-136 lbs and a beautiful and wonderful girlfriend who I loved very much. As I came to school I figured that it was going to be extremely difficult and I had doubts whether I could handle myself let alone a girlfriend. Even still I thought I would give it a try seeing as how we were crazy for each other and I could try and make it work. Little did I know what I was in for. The first two weeks of college were the hardest two weeks of my whole school life. It was full of papers and math homework that I did not understand. I tried to explain to my girlfriend that I was sorry I could not give her the attention she deserved because whenever she called I was always busy. I wanted to tell her how much that I loved her and missed her but I was so stressed out I had to focus on school work. Eventually she got sick and tired of me not being able to pay any attention to her and we decided to go on a "break" until i got onto my feet. Three days later she called me upset that I did not contact her after the break up. She told me that maybe we should not talk for a while and take it slow, so i reluctantly agreed. Soon after, I found she had been seeing a new guy. From then there on it has been a long slippery slope and I have been in damage control for about 2 months. I am sick of not being able to eat, sleep, laugh. I loved her so much and if only she would listen to me now it would be so much easier, but the fact of the matter is that she has moved on and I have not and it is hard for me to comprehend. I am now in recovery and have been for the last two weeks or so. I am feeling much better and I have been able to eat more than usual but still not back to normal. Basically what it comes down to is that for the first month of college I gained 20 lbs. and since then I lost 15 lbs. In saying that anyone would be proud but it was an unhealthy 15 lbs. that i lost. I am not proud of what I have become.
signs and symtoms of depression-----> http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_signs_types_diagnosis_treatment.htm
P.S.- Do not ever let the ones that you love or the ones that love you ever get away from you. If you love someone there is a reason for them in your life, Forever and Always.
3 comments:
First of all, sorry that your relationship didn't work out. I can imagine how difficult it is to have a relationship in college. When I was a senior in high school, I struggled with a similar situation. I was involved in school clubs, was in the soccor team, had a job, and on top of that I had a boyfriend. Like your girlfriend, he too grew frustrated so we broke up. After that, I realized I had made a mistake by letting him go, but it was too late. I believe that everything happens for a reason; maybe it was a good thing that you two split up...you never know what life has in mind for you.
Im sorry that your relationship couldn't work, i know how hard it is to keep a long distance relationship going. I have a similar situation also where my boyfriend doesn't understand how much different it is being away at school than a community college. He thinks that when I say Im too busy to talk that I am out partying all the time with other guys and really I'm in my room for most of the week trying to get all my homework done for the next day. As a girl I understand how she would feel ignored, but maybe later on you two will realize that it was just a tough time and you'll get back together or you realize that you'll find someone even better who understands what's going on in your life right now. Everything happens for a reason.
I think you can tell from these comments that you aren't alone in your situation. I also went through something similar with my boyfriend. We were together for about two years before I came here, and he goes to community college. At one point, I went through basically the worst week of my life out here, I was depressed and I felt like I made the wrong choice coming here. I felt like he wasn't trying hard enough to help me and that he didn't care about me as much as he use to, or at least he wasn't showing it. I'm 100% better now, but we aren't together right now because of other circumstances. I also had a really hard time not being with him, but we're getting better and he's still my best friend. The point is, everyone goes through roughs times, but you just have to get through it with your friends that you know will be there for you and everything will turn out fine.
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